Audit Me: A Second Request

(CBS)  The following is a weekly 60 Minutes Wednesday commentary by columnist Steve Hartman.

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Because the government is so hurting for money, the IRS says it will be auditing a lot more people this year -- to which I say, "Good, it's about time."

In my family, we've always hated tax cheats and their weasely ways.

"Other people cheat so therefore why can't they cheat," says my mother, who's a part-time tax preparer, and full-time goody two-shoes. "Bet you anything those are the same people who steal from the office."

Growing up, my parents always stressed honesty in taxes. They could have cared less what I did with my life, as long as I didn't fudge my Schedule D.

"You can tell a person's philosophy of life," says my mother. "If they cheat on taxes, they'll cheat on other things."

And perhaps because I grew up in that twisted environment, I'm more than a little disappointed that I've never been audited. It's like doing your homework and the teacher not checking it. What's the incentive?

So last year, I went down to the IRS, where they don't allow cameras, to try and get the recognition I deserve.

Hartman: I'm here to be audited.

I'm pretty sure they thought I was on medication.

I waited one hour, before finally …

Hartman: "You can request it? Have people done [that] before?

IRS: It would be rare.

I actually did that. Last year, along with my forms, I sent a written request asking to be audited. But still no audit.

So this year, I'm upping the ante. Along with forms and the same written request, I'm sending gifts. I'm pretty sure these gifts will work. But if not, I'm hoping the gifts are at least deductible.