Comments on: Where's Molly?
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- I, too, remember Jeff's sister who was unmentionable (except in whispers) as we were growing up. It didn't seem odd at the time, just the way it was. Let's not forget Cindy's important role in this amazing story. Cindy's characteristic strong-willed personality, perseverance, and sisu (Finnish: guts) complemented Jeff's undying love and natural inquisitiveness that resulted in not only locating Molly, but warmly welcoming her back into her long-lost family.
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- Jeff's story was similar to mine. When I was three my older sister Carolyn was taken away and again when I was seven my younger sister Connie was removed from our home. We were told that their needs were to demanding for my mother, who had four other children. Mother visited them at first, but by the time I was 12 they seemed forgotten. She told us that siblings were not allowed to visit, and soon we forgot as well. When I was 14 Carolyn died. Connie died four years later. I remember how upset my mother was about both of their passing. It was not until I had my own children that I questioned how they could have left their children. The guilt I felt for being selfish and not trying to visit is sometimes overwhelming. There really isn't anyone to talk to about this because it brings up such painful memories. My mother has passed; my daddy is still with us. I can't see how upsetting an 89 year-old man will make things any better, but I do wonder what his thinking was. You report made me feel better about things, knowing we were not the only family to face this. Also, I hope more Mollys can be found. I am just sorry Carolyn and Connie were alone.
I love you girls and hope you can forgive me. - Reply to this comment
- I share my life for the sole reason of educating the abled bodied who turnt their seeing eyes a way..Yep for years cried in my sleep.. I know this as my roommate has heard me cry in my sleep..The bloody family secret that no one wants to talk about..The perfect marriage..Perfect this/that..When a handicapped baby is born...It spoils it all..Put said child away and not ever bring it up..They go on to have perfect lives..The handicapped are locked away. In bad foster homes..Parents forced to give them up..The good of the other children..The lies of a period..Money talks and bs walks.
In America..I am appalled..The govt is the blame as well. I had controling foster parents who would not allow us to hear the news of the day..They banned TV,newspapers, friends,family..We did not attend church..The few family photos I had were torn up when I was in foster home. - Reply to this comment
- As I watched this story about Jeff and his search for his sister Molly, I was struck by the similarity to my life with one exception. My profoundly retarded sister Mary Margaret who was born in 1951 was kept in the home and raised by my Mother and Father in the family setting. My mother confided in me not long before she died, that my parents, like Jeff's were advised by the medical staff to institutionalize my sister for the "good of the family". She went on to say that it was my father in particular who vehemently opposed that notion and vowed the as long as he lived his daughter would be cared for in the home. Unfortunately he died in 1969 when I was 23 and Mary Margaret was 17. My Mother took over as her sole care giver and with my help kept my sister in the home until her death from congestive heart failure at the age of 43. My mother passed away one year later, believing I feel that it was ok for her to let go, knowing her work in raising Mary Margaret was finished. I am so pleased to learn of Jeff's story and the fact that he was ultimately able to reunite with his sister Molly.
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- As I watched this story about Jeff and his search for his sister Molly, I was struck by the similarity to my life with one exception. My profoundly retarded sister Mary Margaret who was born in 1951 was kept in the home and raised by my Mother and Father in the family setting. My mother confided in me not long before she died, that my parents, like Jeff's were advised by the medical staff to institutionalize my sister for the "good of the family". She went on to say that it was my father in particular who vehemently opposed that notion and vowed the as long as he lived his daughter would be cared for in the home. Unfortunately he died in 1969 when I was 23 and Mary Margaret was 17. My Mother took over as her sole care giver and with my help kept my sister in the home until her death from congestive heart failure at the age of 43. My mother passed away one year later, believing I feel that it was ok for her to let go, knowing her work in raising Mary Margaret was finished. I am so pleased to learn of Jeff's story and the fact that he was ultimately able to reunite with his sister Molly.
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- yeah boy, don't ya love stories from "The Good Old Days"?
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- Jeff,
Your story brought tears to my eyes, and reminded me of my own story, which could have turned out the same had my parents been forced into that decision. Here is my story.
Back in 1957, a few months after I was born, my parents were given the same diagnosis by the doctors. "You should institutionalize him. He will never amount to anything and will never be anything more than a retarded person." My mother's response to that was not just no, but "Oh HELL No!". My diagnosed condition was Cerebral Palsy, which in 1957 was considered to be a severe developmental disorder. Through 5 years of physical therapy, experimental at that time, and corrective surgery on my eyes to correct the signature crossed eyes associated with C.P. I went public schools, from Kindergarten through Community Collage, with the kids in my neighborhood that I grew up with. All at my mother's insistence, that I be treated like every other kid. My Father was in denial that there ever was any problem with me, and treated me no differently than any of my siblings. He and my mother knew something I didn't find out until just a few years ago. Sometime during my physical therapy and eye surgeries, I was given an intelligence assessment by the doctors treating my condition. My parents were told that I had the potential of having a genius level intelligence. This prognosis was far more believable to my parents than that of the earlier doctors. I was saved by parents that refused to give up.
Thank you for sharing your story, James Anderson - Reply to this comment
- This is a problem in America where families are torn apart. It can't go on..I am one of them..I member Mum talking about me when I was living with her..Her words * what are we going to do with Barbara?* I know she was going to dump me on the town. We never boneded..Years ago handicapped like us were put a way.. The damn thinking of the day..The abled bodied did not want to look at us much less see us..I was meant to be put away for as they were ashamed of us..
oh yes mother hated me..
I am poor. It is so hard to write this.. - Reply to this comment
- What a touching story. What a sad way to lose a sister at 5 yrs old.
I worked at a State funded facility for the developmentally disabled and have heard of the terrible things that occurred there years ago. It's closed now.
I also remembering visiting a friend for several years and finding out later that in the basement where we played and behind a half wall, we never went close to, was a brother that was kept there. It may have been a sister, I don't remember now, but just the thought of being down there and never knowing ... I wonder if that person was listening to us? What was it like back there? That was 33+ yrs ago.... - Reply to this comment
- Dear Jeff, Would you contact me at LKicklight@aol.com
I would very much love to talk with you about your story about your sister and my brother Bobby. How similar, yet different their lives are and how great they have turned out. No doubt I think the general public would live to hear about another path our parents had to take,
God Bless
Lehman Kicklighter - Reply to this comment
