I have a job offer -- do I tell other companies?

Dear Evil HR Lady,

After what seems like an interminable period of job-searching, I finally have a job offer in hand. Yeah! The salary is good (although not spectacular), but it's a job I'm very interested in doing and it's a good fit. I've known the hiring manager for years and am excited about it.

However, last week I interviewed for another job which would also be a spectacularly good fit, and most likely more money. They told me I was one of three very strong candidates. I was the first of the three to interview, and they said they would be meeting to make decisions at the end of next week. After going through the nightmare that is job-hunting, I know that saying they'll decide next week doesn't mean they actually will. 

Should I just take the first job? Should I try to put off the first job until the second makes a decision? I don't want to burn bridges with either company, as I would love to work for both, if not now then in the future. 

First, congratulations on the new job! Second, I"m glad you're thinking about what to do with the other company you have potential with. Even though many companies don't bother to let candidates know when a position has been filled, you're smart not to just disappear.

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I want you to think about something: You've known the hiring manager from the first job for years. Has he gone to great lengths to get you this job? Will turning down this job ruin the relationship?

You are, of course, not required to accept any job. But, if strings have been pulled, you do take the risk that your opportunity to work for this company (or for this person) in the future may be damaged by turning down this job. If you're just going through normal recruiting and networking with the other job, withdrawing won't damage your reputation at all.

But if you would take the second job if it is offered to you, then it's time to be upfront and honest with the second company. I like upfrontness (is that a word?) via email. That way the person has time to think and ask colleagues and such before answering you. If you call up and say, "Hey, I have another job offer, are you going to offer me a job, too?" the answer will most likely be, "Well, congratulations, thanks for letting us know." Click.

So email it is. How about something like this:

Dear [Hiring Manager],

[Paragraph 1 where you write nice things about the position, you and why you are a great fit.]

I've received a job offer from another company. I need to give them an answer by [date]. I am still very interested in the [position] at [your company]. Could you please let me know if it would be possible to have a decision from you by [date]?

Sincerely,

[you]

If they respond with a "yes, we can do that," super! You can wait until that date and then make your decision. If they respond with, "No, I"m sorry." Then you respond very politely with something along these lines:

Thank you so much for letting me know. I am officially withdrawing my application for [position]. I sincerely enjoyed meeting with you and hope we can work together at some future date.

Then you send a LInkedIn invitation to that hiring manager and make sure you keep in touch. You want her to still be thinking of you when she needs someone with your skills in the future.

Have a workplace dilemma? Send your question to [e-mail].

[jsargent100]

When I had a job offer I always told the other companies about other job offers so that I could get the best deal. However, if there is a company where the philosophy is that they accept employees who really want to work for them because of who they are or/and also the company has a structured pay-scale this might not be particularly useful. When I am negotiating for a job I always tell them of other offers so that they know they have an employee who is "wanted" and also that I am a person who gets leverage. Though, I'm not sure how this plays for blue-chip and fortune 500 companies since they have such a large gene-pool to play with. If anyone has feed-back on that it would be interesting.

[mathur.sc]

Very Interesting perspectives.

On the first go , I felt that Suzanne has been correct in her approach to a polite email that may result in a graceful exit without any bad blood.

However, i must admit that reading Touge dreamer's point of view, I am compelled to agree that the bad blood is still created...though with the functional managers & not necessarily with HR.

Also HR guys interview far more candidates than functional managers, to be bothered by such situations.They may be upset for a while, but this is something that happens often and thus they are likely to take it in a stride.

Functional managers invest additional time and energies to select / identify good candidates and may be more upset ...also likely to reject a candidate in future , purely on past reasons.

Here i think a certain level of maturity is required from the candidate to carefully assess both present and prospective offers on functional , cultural and financial expectation match related parameters.

But all said and done, there's no harm in asking the 2nd company's HR team to confirm their decision by a certain date, after which the bird in hand would certainly be a better choice.

Sumit Mathur

Email : [e-mail]
linkedIn : http://ae.linkedin.com/pub/sumit-mathur/5/686/b2
Twitter : sumitmathur80

[joomlads07100]

Hey Suzzane,

It's hardly been few days that I came across your articles on anything related to Human Resource & Organization. It's not just the employees who are entangled in the situation but the HR people also come to know how can the situation be handled. I am glad i came across your blogs & articles. Due to huge culture & mindset difference your articles might not fit in totally but they atleast give you a panoramic view of how things should be handled & what might become a barrier when you grow steadily.

Regards,
Axita

[komoney4]

Awesome breakdown - great advice on how to handle this situation! I would love to see a follow up (if you haven't already covered) how to best leverage a job offer from one company to sweeten an offer from another company.

[touge_dreamer119]

You don't leverage offers especially if a company is interested in you because they have taken the effort to put things together for you. If you do leverage an offer, it just causes bad blood and it doesn't matter how big the city you live in is, you will bump into the same people later on and reputation is important to maintain. Especially among recruiters.

Keep in mind HR really don't have anything to loose as far as the hiring process goes. Its the hiring managers like the CTO, CIO, Development managers etc. who really feel the pain and they are the ones who remember. Especially if they liked the person who they interviewed.

In my opinion I would treat situations like this with a lot of care. Offers aren't accepted or declined, you negotiate, without being swayed by greed. Look for a number and if they hit it and the opportunity is interesting then go for it. Leveraging or gambling with offers like that is a bad idea. This isn't a product you're buying, its choosing an organization that is going to foster and help you grow. If its a shallow choice you're making for money, I would suggest re-evaluating what drives you in your choice of a job, since its careless practices like leveraging offers that leads to organizations retracting offers on individuals without any notice given the fact that they have been burned in the past.

Also there's not much respect that comes from someone forcing a company to do better because you have an offer from another company that's hitting a certain number. Its not hard for a company to bring you on board for 3 months at a higher rate and then get rid of you after that because they found someone cheaper. You're not the only one who can leverage an offer. They can too. You need to give some to get some.