10 reasons you're not the boss

Flickr user Victor1558

(MoneyWatch) Dear Evil HR Lady,

I am the senior person on my team. I handle the biggest workload of all my coworkers, and I have good performance appraisal ratings. So why did someone with three less years of experience than I have just get promoted and is now my boss? They didn't go through an application or interview process. I'm really ticked and want to lodge a formal complaint.

Here's the thing: Who are you going to complain to -- HR? They won't care. They had to sign off on the promotion in the first place. Your boss, until recently your former junior colleague? That won't go over well. Your boss's boss? She's the one who made the decision, so it's not likely she'll say, "Oops! That should have been you. I'll just demote John and put you in that spot."

Unless you suspect that the sole reason for being passed over is one protected by law (race, sex, pregnancy status, and other protected classes), complaining is likely to do you more harm than good. (And just because you are a different race/gender/religion/whatever from the promoted person doesn't mean it was discrimination. You'd need a bunch more evidence.)

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But, that doesn't mean you shouldn't do anything. I would make an appointment with your boss's boss and say something along these lines: "I'm a bit disappointed that I got passed over for promotion. I was wondering if you could tell me three areas that I need improvement in so that I can be a strong candidate the next time an opportunity presents itself."

Chances are the question will make this person a bit uncomfortable, but she will probably speak up and say at least a few things. The key is to keep your mouth shut and listen. Take notes and ask for clarification, but whatever you do, don't object! "But I don't..." will come across not as a valid defense, but as whiner-pants behavior.

And what is your boss's boss likely to say? Management guru Alison Green has a list of 10 reasons you're not the boss. Here's the list:

1. You don't look the part
2. You're terrible at time management
3. You aren't very good at tough conversations.
4. You gossip or are part of a clique
5. You don't know how to prioritize
6. You act entitled
7. You don't manage your own boss well
8. You're a complainer
9. You do your job duties and nothing else
10. You don't make your accomplishments visible

Surprised? As the list shows, clambering up the corporate ladder isn't about workload or length of service or where you got your degree. Managing involves very different skills than being managed.

If you really want to be promoted, listen to the feedback and go over the above list. If you fall short in any of these categories, fix yourself.

Have a workplace dilemma? Send your questions to [e-mail].

[jsargent100]

"I handle the biggest workload of all my coworkers" Before you can move up you have to free yourself of your current responsibilities by delegating them to other people. If you are at the bottom of the food-chain you need to show that you are freed up to take on a higher task.

[jsargent100]

She forgot the most important. Make sure that the company knows that you want the position. Sometimes this isn't as obvious as it seems and you need to push yourself out there.

[JMSTAR100]

Of these 10 reasons, #10 is to the company's -- and its shareholders' -- own detriment. If management, and ultimately even top management, is filled with people who are merely especially good at publicizing themselves, then the company is systematically overlooking their top performers in favor of their top self-promoters.

At many companies, you have to make yourself and your accomplishments visible. But that's not because it's good for the company -- unlike working hard and smart, which you also need to do. (Those are #2, 4, 5, 7, and 9.) It's just because the company is not competent at noticing its own star performers.

If the reason you're not a manager is just because of #10, GO ELSEWHERE. There are companies that DO notice good performers, and will make better use of your talents, to your benefit and theirs. Go ahead: Make the world a better place, and do yourself a favor at the same time -- Leave!

[FluffieDucky]

This happened to a co-worker of mine. She's been with the company for 22 years, and in our dept for 15 of those years. Two management positions opened up, and she assumed she would get one of them because of her tenure.

How wrong she was. The person who was promoted has been here only 13 years.

And what makes it worse is that she still does not fully understand why she didn't get the promotion. It's because she is lacking in current skills. The people who were promoted and I have been trying to help & teach her, but she will not attempt to learn. Tenure doesn't always mean promotion. Work ethic & skills competancy is what is being sought first these days.

[artk2012]

While these are good, I think you've missed a few. First off the other person may have expressed an interest in being a manager; has the LW been working with their supervisor on career planning? Or, did s/he just hope that everybody would notice his/her greatness and realize that a promotion was right?

Second, competence is a trap. If the LW as right and s/he carries the biggest workload, it would be a very bad thing to promote her/him. While nobody is ever irreplaceable, some people can be very expensive to replace and productivity can be hurt in the mean time. Does the LW have a succession plan? Who will take over that huge workload? I'd rather promote a mediocre or good performer over my most productive one, all other things being equal.

[[e-mail]]

I don't want the administrative responsibility that comes with management positions. I hate meetings, Powerpoint presentations and the like. I'm perfectly happy being technical lead. It just burns my @@@ when the newly appointed manager trumps my years of experience with a promise that I know we can't deliver, which makes my team look bad. It takes time before senior management cottons on to the idea that it's the newly appointed manager that's the problem, not the accomplished team.

[mikethebarba]

And the #1 reason you are not the boss....You don't own the company!

[DFLEP1]

This happened to me recently. I was hoping for a promotion and the person who's been here for 2 years (I've been here much longer) got it instead. It was a hard pill to swallow, but I had to try and look at it objectively. My co-worker is much older and has much more experience in this area than I do. I'm just not ready for the kind of responsibility yet. Several people said I should complain to the boss. Why? It's not like the boss will say, "Oh I'm sorry. I made a mistake. I'll take the promotion away from Mrs. Smith and give it to you instead since you've been here longer." It doesn't work that way. There's a reason I wasn't picked: I'm not the right fit for the job right now.