7 signs of a dysfunctional boss

Flickr user Hardleers

(MoneyWatch) COMMENTARY I'm going to go out on a limb here and say the word "dysfunctional" probably describes more people than the word "normal" does. When it comes to CEOs and executives, it's almost certainly true.

You see, leadership dysfunction is far more common than you might think. Not only that, but it's not necessarily a bad thing. Here's a story that I guarantee will get you thinking.

The scene is a psychologist's office in Long Beach, Calif., circa 1990. The "couple's therapy" had turned into a "one-on-one" two sessions ago.

"If I'm so compulsive and dysfunctional," I said, "Then why hasn't it affected my career?"

"Are you kidding?" the shrink laughed, "It's practically a prerequisite for corporate executives!"

Yes, that really did happen. Looking back on it, being dysfunctional actually did affect my career in many ways, both good and bad. Exploring its nature, however, has been all good. And therein lies an opportunity for professional growth that few take advantage of, probably because delusional people all think of themselves as normal. It's ironic, I know.

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Over the years before and since that fateful day, I've worked with loads of top executives -- CEOs mostly -- that I would describe as more dysfunctional than not. And what I've come to understand of their nature is this: Their "issues" -- for lack of a better term -- helped them in some ways and hindered them in others.

To be more specific, I think it helped them achieve initial success, eventually tripped them up and ultimately proved a barrier to reaching their full potential. That's what makes identification so important. To that end and with all due humility, I give you a composite of all those wacky and colorful executives: 7 signs of a dysfunctional boss.

The game has rules, but the rules keep changing. It's a relatively common but insidious game I call "chaos and control." If they sense you becoming disloyal, too comfortable, or too powerful, they'll want to knock you off the pedestal they've put you on. By bringing you down, it boosts their position relative to yours. One day you're the golden boy, a trusted advisor who can do no wrong. The next day you're a bumbling idiot.

Major focus on minutiae. One Fortune 500 CEO was obsessed with my clothes and appearance. He wasn't alone in that peculiarity; it's a sign of a controlling person. And whatever details get their maniacal attention, whatever the object of their obsessive compulsion, it's really just a way to distract their brains from facing their own sadness, fear or depression. That's why it's often triggered by stress and bad news.

A "man of the people." I just saw "The Last King of Scotland" about Uganda's former President Idi Amin last week and nearly fell off my chair at how common that particular mantra is among dysfunctional leaders. In reality, they thrive on attention and adoration from the masses to feed their deep-seated insecurity but are rarely capable of any true emotional connection with others.

Hypersensitive and vindictive when rejected. Everything's about them -- you're just a tiny little asteroid revolving around their planet-sized ego. Anything you do that they perceive as rejection, even if you're just not letting them be the center of attention, is a personal affront. There will be repercussions. Some are direct, bullying or verbally abusive; others are more subtle, underhanded or passive-aggressive.

Failure is not an option. They're always pointing fingers, making excuses, and blaming others because they can never really be wrong in their own eyes. They will say they're not perfect, that they make mistakes, but you'll never get them to admit to one in real time. To do so would potentially fracture that fragile facade of being special and Godlike. Deep inside, they're really frightened children, which is why the pretense is so critical to maintain.

Loves distraction, hates surprises. They revel in the tiniest distraction. They can be entertained or even entertain themselves with surprisingly silly diversions. Anything to take them away from the depressing reality of boring, mundane, day-to-day life that mere mortals must endure. But surprise them with serious news, especially bad news in front of others, and you're in big, big trouble.

Sees conspiracy everywhere. Since the world revolves around them, they see conspiracy in coincidence and deep meaning in incidental remarks. That's why they so often overreact or even panic over what appears to be nothing. Little things become life-threatening. Why? Even though it's stressful for them, it also affirms their self-importance and makes them feel big. Grandiosity is often a response to depression.

Now, before you start playing amateur shrink, running around diagnosing CEOs with serious personality disorders, keep one important thing in mind: The first sentence of the article. And remember that "normal" is a societal mean that defines a behavioral bell curve. Since nobody's dead-center in the middle, that means we're all somewhere on the curve. It's a sobering thought, I know.

Image courtesy of Flickr user Hardleers

[ChrisAtWork]

I also enjoyed reading this blog article look at when a boss goes from being difficult to being dysfunctional.

http://collaborative-coaching.com/working-with-dysfunctional-boss/

<a href="http://collaborative-coaching.com/working-with-dysfunctional-boss/">Here</a>

[RMSx32767]

I had a boss that met all 7 criteria, and despite being the boss he was neither a manager nor a leader.

[mostinterested]

"Deep inside, they're really frightened children" - that really spoke to me. I've long subscribed to the idea (not mine, of course) that "difficult" bosses are nothing but misbehaving children deep inside. This article is an excellent description of really dysfunctional cases, the ones you have to tiptoe around. It's a good survival guide - till you find a better job. I personally wouldn't stay around that level of dysfunction for long. But milder cases can often be "reformed" if you look at their inner (misbehaving) child and just do what a good parent would. Author Lynn Taylor (Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant) offers a very good guide to that effect in her book and blog.

[jgnv]

I appear to be in the minority, but as a person who is now unemployed after working over 40 years, I found it provided a very enlightening retrospective for me. Whether you agree with all the dysfunctional attributes the writer discussed or not, as a young person entering the work force for the first time, you can use them as a guideline and perhaps avoid or navigate certain situations without suffering any long term repercussions. In order to have a successful career, it's important to realize that you may not be able to change the world, but you can make it a better place for yourself and those you care about.

[DiamondRockSolid]

Self Criticism in the context of 'Constructive Criticism', I find is very Healthy... and knowing to deal well with different people, continuing to grow as Leaders is a core aspect of what Leaders do to improve themselves. When a statement or writing appear or seem to be geared toward one to compromise certain important values and character, or to step down excellence a knot may easily imply or be interpreted as being expected to do that.. which if care is not taken, it will happen and be expected till such higher standards do not exist anymore or completely downgraded to 'insignificant' lacking 'recognition', 'respect' and becomes 'unremarkable'. As far as improving, see, I think we must continue to be more interested to focus much more on strengths-talents now and complementing weaknesses, than working on the weaknesses which can be draining. If dysfunctional leaders wish to apply Self Criticism or 'Constructive Self-Criticism'.. well, I believe 'convictions and habits' are not like gloves, they cannot be easily changed. They will be more effective through action, than by words and/or politics...or the use of the media to propagate such... I too stay from the media and to avoid infections...:)

[DiamondRockSolid]

This is one of those topics. My 'Straight-Shooter' perspective starts with questions: What is this writing or article looking to achieve? What is the intention, the motive, the goal? Is there any good thing like an idea, innovation, inspirational leadership and such to better a life, business or someone that in this article?

[wkb4447]

While not designated as such, my perspective is that the traits described as dysfunctional are largely displayed by male executives and business owners. Women have their own set of dysfunctional issues, similar in some ways to these, but displayed or carried out in a much different manner.

After one frustrating day of dealing with such a boss as described in the article, it hit me: he's my DAD! Then, I reflected on my father's early childhood and the relationship he had with his father. Suddenly, it all became clear.

[omitshiim]

The worst i ever heard of was this morning when I read about Boss of Spirit Airlines saying he could care less about customer complaints. And also even though every veteran and service member is now boycotting them he say's I don't care. Article below. If anybody has any stock in Spirit I would say it's time to bail because you don't have to be a rocket scientist to figure out the outcry from the american public is going to make this airline go bankrupt fast.
http://www.foxnews.com/us/2012/05/03/spirit-airlines-outpaces-competitors-regarding-passenger-complaints-statistics/

[mrketter]

I am glad I passed this test. The real title should be "7 signs of a dysfunctional person" because that is who they were before becoming bosses. Let's face it not everyone is a good Chef and not everyone is a sane Boss. I think every Management level and above employee should undergo a psychological evaluation. That being said, half would probably fail.

I have worked hard to implement sort of a Franchise culture. Every one who works with DKWTechnik is basically his/her own business owner. They have to follow certain guidelines and branding restraints. But actually they all have ownness of there failure or success. This has essentially changed me from being a Boss to being a fellow entrepreneur interested in the success of the underlying venture (DKWTechnik).

[whgeiger100]

The premise and supporting arguments presented here are at best, sophomoric, if not down-right moronic.
The claim that my boss is "dysfunctional" appears to me to be an excuse for "monkey passing" made by an employee, who refuses to perform or is incapable of performing "complete staff work".
"It is my bosses fault" dog does not hunt well here. If your career cup is half empty, look in the mirror to find fault. Maybe the dysfunctional attribution belongs elsewhere!
Success (or failure) of a company has to do with setting planning horizons, deployment of technology, financial management, effective leadership, and the nature of attitudes projected collectively from the corporate ivory tower. The idiosyncrasies of an immediate boss who is not being properly supported by a staff member, has little to do with that issue.