3-D: They're reaching out (into your wallet)

The hottest contemporary trend in Hollywood is leaving our contributor Conor Knighton cold:

This morning, instead of doing a NEW commentary, I thought I'd just show you an old piece you've already seen.

Except now, I'm going to charge you four EXTRA DOLLARS to watch it, because it's in THHHHREEEEE DEEEEEE!

Sounds like a terrible April Fool's joke, right? And yet, that's the joke Hollywood keeps pulling on all of us.

The extra "D" in 3-D? It apparently stands for DOLLARS, and studios keep raking them in by capitalizing on the 3-D craze.

This week, "Titanic" comes back to theaters. This is a movie that's ALREADY made over $1.8 billion worldwide. And yet, executives are betting that folks will pay as much as $20 a ticket to see Jack and Rose again in IMAX 3-D.

In February, George Lucas did the exact same thing. "Star Wars Episode One: The Phantom Menace" was re-released in 3-D. (Unfortunately, the characters remained pretty one-dimensional.)

3-D releases have already been announced for "Top Gun," "The Little Mermaid," "Jurassic Park."

Can 3-D "Citizen Kane" be far behind? "Sophie's Choice: 3-D"?

These older movies were never MEANT to be shown in 3-D - they've been converted in post-production. As a result, the effects mostly just look UNNECESSARY. The images look murky.

The motive, however, is perfectly clear - adding 3-D to a movie is a commercial decision, not a creative one.

So you know what? You can keep your glasses. I'll think I'll keep my money.

[yelobrikroad]

I'd see TITanic 3D for only 2 reasons! You guess what they are!

[DSMacG]

There is an old joke that there are really only seven plots in Hollywood which would go a long way towards explaining the rehash craze. Not just movies to 3D but TV shows from the 60s being made into features; remember the Brady Brides. The worst was making a feature from a Neal Diamond song that never really made it to #1, Copa Cabana. The song covered the whole thing the movie did but managed it in less than four minutes.

When the providers of quality entertainment end their 45 year strike there will be movies that are worth the price of admission.

[omnibus66]

You can't convert an old film shot in two dimensions into real 3D. But aside from that, a movie is good or bad based on its content, not visual trickery. If you're being tricked into spending money to watch anything, just because it's in 3D, let me give you a suggestion. Go outside, to a park, to the beach, to the mountains, or just look at the sky on a clear night. It's all in 100% 3D, with million channel surround sound, and unlimited color hues. You can even smell the flowers, feel the breeze and touch the scenery. Reality is the ultimate sensual experience, and will never be matched in any artificial setting. A good movie is a nice diversion, but it is, after all, just a movie.

[icuping]

I prefer movies in 3-D (If they were made for it)and wouldn't waste the money to see the 2-D version... But I'm also one of those people that only sees a movie once (usually) and I also tend not to watch movies that were made before I was...

Also commonsense would tell you that if you only had one eye 3-D is not for you...

[idealhobbies]

Agreed....

Pointless conversions. Greed motivated.

I am a little lost on the Titanic in 3d... WHY? Top Gun, I could possibly see because of the action (and that is a stretch)...but Titanic?

Next month... Sparticus in 3d! The Ten Commandments! The parting of the Red Sea in brilliant 3d! I better quit before I give someone ideas.

[get_down]

3-D craze? Never - not my better-half nor me. We prefer to watch the one with 2-D and we'll skip the 3-D if it's the only one showing. Nowadays I'm retired and living on my pension and my Social Security benefit along with my better-half. Since we live a frugal lives, either my pension or my SS benefit would be enough to cover our monthly expenses, which would leave the other as discretionary spending. We'd like to support our nearby run-down theater but only when they show 2-D quality movies.

[barbaram99]

3-D is useless to us with one eye...We can't see it..I can't,,