Feeding the forces

For several days last summer, parts of London and some other English cities erupted in a spate of mindless riots. What made these events so disturbing was the fact that many of the perpetrators were previously respectable citizens with no record of crime.  The violence cost tens of millions of dollars and still puzzles our politicians. The police were criticised for reacting too slowly.

But now we are beginning to learn why.  A detailed survey of the cops on duty has pinpointed crucial tactical errors - they worked far too long and too hard, and they didn't have the right equipment. But, above all, they were famished.  

This thing is part of the explanation. It is (or once was) a fresh sandwich. Probably edible straight out of the fridge, but likely to decompose if left in a hot police vehicle for ten hours while the boys are busy rounding up looters.  The trouble is police catering departments always order egg, chicken and tuna sandwiches - the most likely villains when it comes to salmonella poisoning.  So when the trunk of your typical squad car starts to resemble a dodgy deli, it is no wonder that crooks can smell them coming. 

Two and half thousand British policemen worked for two weeks solid in August without a single day's break - and during that time all they got to eat were very tired sandwiches. It is a miracle the riots aren't still in progress.  But that's all history - and perhaps the lessons, if not the revolting sandwiches, have now been swallowed.   

One police force, north of the border in Scotland, is already trying to hire a new food supplier and has issued 10,000 words of precise specifications - for example, their sandwiches must be made of baguette bread, brown and white, exactly 11 inches long and offering seventeen different fillings including brie and cranberry, smoked salmon and prawn mayonnaise.  Potato chips have to contain no less than 1.217 ounces in every packet. 16.907 fluid ounce bottles of water must be still or carbonated and supplied exclusively from Scottish springs.